I’m not sure which is the shittier gift from Canada to America: Justin Bieber or Ted Cruz? Sorry America but they’re your headache now. Maybe you could regift them to Putin or Kim Jong Un. Share this:TwitterFacebookGoogleLike this:Like Loading... Related Suffering for Art Starting a Cult: Update Categories: HumourTags: Canada, Gift, Justin Bieber, Ted Cruz 83 replies › Amy 03/23/2015 • 6:22 PM Perhaps we can just leave them at the nearest boarder crossing, ring the bell and run. Seriously though. I’m laughing so much I’m crying, but that could just be over the fool who announced his Presidential bid more than a year and a half before the freaking elections. I can hear my phone ringing already… LikeLiked by 1 person Reply ↓ John Callaghan 03/23/2015 • 6:40 PM And he looks weird. I know that shouldn’t matter. But still. LikeLiked by 1 person Reply ↓ Ruth 03/23/2015 • 6:23 PM Geez, thanks for the gifts. Isn’t there some kind of return policy, though? I’ve wondered aloud why Justin Bieber hasn’t been deported. LikeLiked by 1 person Reply ↓ John Callaghan 03/23/2015 • 7:18 PM No return on anything bought on sale. Sorry. LikeLike Reply ↓ Victo Dolore 03/23/2015 • 6:28 PM YOU?!?!! WTF? YOU? I should have known… LikeLiked by 2 people Reply ↓ John Callaghan 03/23/2015 • 7:19 PM Hahaha. And Cruz is a Senator from Texas isn’t he? LikeLiked by 1 person Reply ↓ Victo Dolore 03/23/2015 • 7:37 PM Hush your mouth! Not all of us claim him… LikeLiked by 1 person John Callaghan 03/23/2015 • 7:44 PM If President doesn’t work out maybe he’ll be governor. LikeLiked by 1 person Victo Dolore 03/23/2015 • 7:46 PM I hate you. I hope there is a zombie attack while you are out walking with your wife…. LikeLiked by 1 person John Callaghan 03/23/2015 • 7:48 PM When Cruz becomes governor all medicine will be deemed a violation of God’s law. As will women. LikeLiked by 1 person Victo Dolore 03/23/2015 • 7:53 PM That will make my job easier. LikeLiked by 1 person John Callaghan 03/23/2015 • 7:57 PM Come to Canada. You will always have a home here. LikeLiked by 1 person Victo Dolore 03/23/2015 • 8:04 PM But it might turn me into Ted Cruz or Bieber… Then, there are the zombies to contend with. LikeLiked by 1 person John Callaghan 03/23/2015 • 8:05 PM I’d rather you be a zombie than either of those two. Hell, you’d be smarter, I tell ya what. LikeLiked by 1 person Victo Dolore 03/23/2015 • 8:08 PM Amen. LikeLiked by 1 person John Callaghan 03/23/2015 • 7:44 PM Hahahaha LikeLiked by 1 person hollie 03/23/2015 • 6:37 PM I’m quite neither Putin nor Kim John Un want Bieber or Cruz. I don’t know much about Cruz, but I feel like Bieber is a disgrace to humanity. LikeLike Reply ↓ John Callaghan 03/23/2015 • 7:26 PM Oh Cruz is a real piece of work. You’ll probably be hearing a lot from him in the next little while. He declared his run for president today. LikeLike Reply ↓ hollie 03/23/2015 • 7:31 PM Great. Wait, I thought you said he was Canadian? Oh, bother LikeLiked by 1 person John Callaghan 03/23/2015 • 7:33 PM Yeah. He was somehow able to renounce his citizenship (oh shame) and so he must be able to run. LikeLiked by 1 person hollie 03/23/2015 • 7:36 PM I hate election the time around elections where all you hear is “I’m so and so, and I approve this message” like very five seconds on the TV. LikeLiked by 1 person John Callaghan 03/23/2015 • 7:43 PM We get them hear too. Some of them are really mean. LikeLike hollie 03/23/2015 • 7:43 PM Maybe I need to brush up on my facts (which is sad because I have a master’s in history) but I thought you had to be born in the US to be President. I feel like the 2016 race is going to be extra annoying. LikeLiked by 1 person John Callaghan 03/23/2015 • 7:46 PM That’s what I thought. As long as one parent was born in America. In this case it was his mother. LikeLike hollie 03/23/2015 • 7:50 PM I’m working up a post about our first gay president (Buchanan) in the vein of my “climbing Mt. Jerry” post. I thought of you when I wrote the one for today actually…. I saw my lunch and the insane amount of visible garlic all over it and immediately heard what I imagine to be your voice saying “I smell the stink!” LikeLiked by 1 person John Callaghan 03/23/2015 • 7:56 PM I need to read that. Just haven’t had a chance. Geez, Cruz and Bieber sure stir people up. I would yell at you from Canada if I knew you were violating your breath with that much garlic! LikeLike hollie 03/23/2015 • 7:57 PM I threw it out. It was disgusting. LikeLiked by 1 person John Callaghan 03/23/2015 • 7:59 PM Then I’ll stop yelling. Phew. LikeLiked by 1 person hollie 03/23/2015 • 8:01 PM I can’t hear you anyway. LikeLiked by 1 person John Callaghan 03/23/2015 • 8:03 PM I’m yelling in your head. (whispers) I’m in your head. LikeLiked by 2 people hollie 03/23/2015 • 8:04 PM lmao LikeLiked by 1 person Ruth 03/24/2015 • 3:25 AM Where are all the birthers now?!? Somehow because he’s a Republican his birth certificate doesn’t count but President Obama’s does. LikeLiked by 2 people John Callaghan 03/24/2015 • 8:48 AM How dare you question this man! A Rebublican by nature is pure American, his party card is all he needs to prove that. LikeLiked by 1 person Ruth 03/24/2015 • 9:32 AM I’m a blasphemer like that. I know he’s eligible to run based on his citizenship by proxy. It’s just so very ironic that the poster boy for the Tea Party has such a similar circumstance and, yet, I haven’t heard anybody asking to see his birth certificate. *rolling my eyes* LikeLiked by 1 person John Callaghan 03/24/2015 • 9:45 AM There probably isn’t a birth certificate. My suspicion is he was created in a lab by Dr. Evil. LikeLiked by 2 people John Guillen 03/23/2015 • 6:39 PM Ha. Funny. But Ted Cruz is about as likely to be President as I am. He irritates EVERYONE. LikeLiked by 3 people Reply ↓ John Callaghan 03/23/2015 • 7:27 PM Guillen for President! LikeLiked by 1 person Reply ↓ John Guillen 03/23/2015 • 7:49 PM YES! Just need a slogan. LikeLiked by 1 person John Callaghan 03/23/2015 • 7:53 PM “Don’t go to the John. Vote for John.” Meh, not my best work but you’re getting this for free so . . . LikeLike John Guillen 03/23/2015 • 7:54 PM BAHAHAHA! What I was going to say is no match for that. LikeLiked by 1 person John Callaghan 03/23/2015 • 7:57 PM I’ll put it on a t-shirt. LikeLike John Guillen 03/23/2015 • 8:01 PM I need that shirt yesterday. 2016 is fast approaching. LikeLiked by 2 people John Callaghan 03/23/2015 • 8:04 PM I’ll send it on the next dog sled. LikeLike John Guillen 03/23/2015 • 8:07 PM Hahaha they won’t make it here. Much too hot outside. LikeLiked by 1 person John Callaghan 03/23/2015 • 8:09 PM You’re probably right. The dream is over. But it was a blast. LikeLike John Guillen 03/23/2015 • 8:21 PM I was planning on hiring you as my campaign manager. Oh well. LikeLiked by 1 person John Callaghan 03/23/2015 • 8:30 PM Oh that job is mine. You really don’t get much of a say. I’m going to be “the man behind the man.” LikeLiked by 1 person John Guillen 03/23/2015 • 8:32 PM The man behind the man. I hope that’s a quote that I just don’t know! Hahaha! LikeLiked by 1 person John Callaghan 03/23/2015 • 8:35 PM Hahahaha. It is. It means the politician is the is there to carry out the will of his benefactors and those who get him elected. What? You thought I wanted to smell your hair? LikeLike John Guillen 03/23/2015 • 8:40 PM That’s what I thought. And I also had a literal picture in mind. 😩 My hair smells nice. LikeLiked by 2 people John Callaghan 03/23/2015 • 8:47 PM Better not let Mr. Cruz hear you talk about smelling hair. LikeLike John Guillen 03/23/2015 • 8:48 PM Once again, I don’t understand the reference. I fail. LikeLiked by 2 people John Callaghan 03/23/2015 • 8:51 PM Relax. Cruz is big time anti gay so even a hint of that might set him off. You do not fail. I do not get shit all the time. I ask. LikeLiked by 1 person John Guillen 03/23/2015 • 8:54 PM Oh. I knew that much about him. He’s from my state and try very hard not to keep up with everything he says or does. LikeLiked by 2 people John Callaghan 03/23/2015 • 8:55 PM God bless Texas. LikeLike John Guillen 03/23/2015 • 9:39 PM That’s a song. Pretty sure. LikeLike jan 03/23/2015 • 6:47 PM Thanks a lot Canada! I’m reblogging this post if I can figure out how to do it. LikeLiked by 1 person Reply ↓ John Callaghan 03/23/2015 • 7:29 PM No, thank you for taking them off our hands. Even with all the snow Canada is so much better. LikeLike Reply ↓ jan 03/23/2015 • 6:48 PM Reblogged this on JT Twissel and commented: Just had to… thanks so much Canada! LikeLike Reply ↓ andreathompson2 03/23/2015 • 7:08 PM AHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!! LikeLiked by 1 person Reply ↓ John Callaghan 03/23/2015 • 7:31 PM I know. Right? LikeLike Reply ↓ kingmidget 03/23/2015 • 8:05 PM I have this feeling that these will be the kind of gifts that will keep right on giving for years to come. Thanks. A lot. LikeLiked by 2 people Reply ↓ John Callaghan 03/23/2015 • 8:06 PM No no. Thank you for taking them. And we have a really strict return policy. LikeLiked by 1 person Reply ↓ kingmidget 03/23/2015 • 8:12 PM I’m pretty sure I have the receipts around here some place. Seriously, I look at Ted Cruz running for President and wonder how this can possibly be. LikeLiked by 2 people John Callaghan 03/23/2015 • 8:19 PM I love America. The land of opportunity. LikeLiked by 1 person kingmidget 03/23/2015 • 8:22 PM Give me your tired, your poor, your huddled masses … oh, and throw in your arrogantly stupid idiots. LikeLiked by 1 person John Callaghan 03/23/2015 • 8:31 PM Be grateful we didn’t send Rob Ford and his idiot brother Doug. LikeLike Anxious Mom 03/23/2015 • 9:14 PM My husband thought I was lying when I told him about Cruz announcing that he’s running. “Wait, isn’t he one of the guys wanting to see Obama’s birth certificate to verify that he was born here?” Now if only Sarah Palin and Rand Paul will announce. Most entertaining GOP primary in the history of the worlds. LikeLiked by 1 person Reply ↓ John Callaghan 03/23/2015 • 9:18 PM I can’t wait for the primaries! I love American politics. If you guys put another Bush in the White House I’ll shit my pants. LikeLiked by 1 person Reply ↓ Anxious Mom 03/23/2015 • 9:21 PM Where there’s a will (and passing discriminatory voting laws), there’s a way. That reminds me of a bumper sticker I saw back in 2007. “Hilary: A Smarter Bush for President.” LikeLiked by 1 person John Callaghan 03/23/2015 • 9:31 PM Oh that’s clever. I like it. LikeLike MeglyMc 03/23/2015 • 11:31 PM In your defense, he’s not even Canadian, but the unholy hybrid of an American and Cuban who just SPAWNED in Canada. We don’t blame you. We blame Satan. LikeLiked by 1 person Reply ↓ John Callaghan 03/23/2015 • 11:38 PM I’ve heard even Satan is denying responsibility. Some things are even too fucked up for him. LikeLiked by 1 person Reply ↓ MeglyMc 03/23/2015 • 11:56 PM Read: The Current American Republican Party LikeLiked by 1 person John Callaghan 03/23/2015 • 11:56 PM You have point there. LikeLiked by 1 person List of X 03/29/2015 • 9:22 PM I’d take Bieber over Cruz any time. At least Bieber isn’t trying to be my president. LikeLiked by 1 person Reply ↓ John Callaghan 03/29/2015 • 9:31 PM There is something so off putting about Cruz. A creepiness. Shit. Maybe Bieber will run for Prime Minister of Canada. Yikes. LikeLike Reply ↓ List of X 03/29/2015 • 9:32 PM Maybe, but I think he’s much more qualified to be the mayor of Toronto. LikeLiked by 1 person daveb42 04/02/2015 • 6:05 PM I’m think regifting Bieber and giving him to Cruz might be fitting. Cruz would need his Obamacare. BTW, I’ve heard all that stuff about having one US citizen as a parent being good enough, but I still want to see his birth certificate. If you don’t believe Hawaii, why would you believe Canada. LikeLiked by 1 person Reply ↓ John Callaghan 04/02/2015 • 7:41 PM I’d like a DNA test. Just so we know he isn’t some holy robot created by the GOP. LikeLiked by 1 person Reply ↓ daveb42 04/02/2015 • 8:07 PM Wasn’t there a church with people called holy robots? Maybe he’d be proud. LikeLiked by 1 person John Callaghan 04/02/2015 • 8:25 PM With a name like that I’d be tempted to join. LikeLiked by 1 person daveb42 04/02/2015 • 8:57 PM Me too LikeLiked by 1 person Reply ↓ Leave a Reply Cancel reply Enter your comment here... 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